Adding details to dialogue

Don’t let your characters float in space!  Add setting (what your characters can see) and internal writing (what your characters think or feel) to your dialogue.  Copy your dialogue onto a new page in your WNB and add details between the dialogue.

In the example below, the new, or revised writing is in red.

Example:

“Hey, are you mad at me?” asked Michelle.

Michelle looked out over the field and noticed that the leaves on the trees were starting to change color.

“No, are you mad at me?” replied Ricardo.

Ricardo had been worried about their relationship ever since they had first been visited by giants.   He took a deep breath and thought about how much everything had changed.  His leather sandals flopped against the dirt path as they walked along.

“I’m not mad at all. I guess I’ve just been scared to go on this quest,” explained Michelle.

Above their heads, orange clouds were gathering quickly. They could hear the sound of the leaves blowing in the distance.